Rakuli

Sunset

When I was younger I’d stare at the sun and stumble, blind and erratic, for several minutes as I waited for the ghostly imprint to clear from my vision. I grew older, realised that there are some things too powerful to look upon directly, and no longer tried to out-stare the sun. But it seems that bad habits morph when they don’t grow worse and a picture of you follows me permanently like a watermark on my image of the world. I try not to look at it directly but all too often I let my attention waver and it focuses on you, making my thoughts stumble, blind and erratic. I try to clear you from my mind but with the effort comes the feeling that I am pushing away my sun. And when I can see again, it is in the gloom of eternal twilight.

(Source: rakuli)

When I ruled the world

When I ruled the world with an iron fist
No issue arose I simply dismissed
Yes I was feared but also respected
Trusted to guide through paths unexpected 

I remember the day, I remember the hour
I started to focus on personal power
Passing on duties to those down below
I thought to ignore what I did not know

The problem with delegating the reign
Is subordinates also want personal gain
So I tried to be a master executive
While my name was attached to errors consecutive

‘Fore I knew of the faults I was pulled down by riots
And try as I might, I could not deny it
I had neglected those for whom I had charge
I was seeing the results of mistakes loom large

When those in authority work themselves harder
People are happy with you as their martyr 
Abusing that power for personal wealth
Will lead to results not good for your health

So when you rule the world with an iron fist
Remember me and the disaster I kissed
Keep focus on duties and watch those below
If errors are made you will want to know 

I would love to be him but …

Let me be the guy that makes you forget about the man you want. That man, who you write about and dream of, he may exist, but at the moment I am not convinced. Let me be the guy that stops you focussing on an impossible prototype and teaches you that a human can earn your love too. Your list of must-have traits could use chapters and I am yet to reach the end of your “desirables”, but I can say that all of the men I have ever met combined would not fulfil three quarters of what you cannot live without.

I am not one for tattoos and radical activism is not my style, but I will pet a puppy and write how much I love you all over my arms. I am unlikely to be famous and rarely cry my way through movies, but I will hug you when you are upset and write you a lullaby if you are lacking music. I will not assume you are lying when you tell me you are fine and I will resent it if you expect me to decipher a code beneath your words. And sometimes my lust will rage and I will think of little else but there will be plenty of days where I will simply hold you close in bed. 

I do not complete your perfect list, in fact, I do not even come close. Has anyone? Ever? Let me be the guy that does a few things you love very well and a few things you hate, rarely. If you continue looking for the man who does everything you love and nothing that you hate, you will find bitterness and despair when people keep falling short; the closest you will come is accepting false promises and realising too late that they are lies.

I am not the man of your dreams and never will be, but neither is the next guy. There was a time when you forgot I was human for long enough to love me. Let me be the guy who reminds you that humans can earn your love too.

Tidbits (You are a writer)

Fleeting moments, fierce opponents, form components of our lives
Still reflections, chased affection, small inflections cut like knives. We
Hoard possessions, build obsessions, flow through sessions, strive to strive. To
Leave the station, leave the nation, beat inflation, build a hive

Raw emotion, calming oceans, your devotion to another
Efforts wasted, sorrow tasted, photos pasted to try smother
Body glowing, nothing showing,  you are owing to your brother
Your potential, your credentials, consequential to your mother 

Have you ever, you may never, love forever, be a fighter
Life is scary, oh contrary, we could nary hold on tighter
Be appeasing, always pleasing, slowly easing your light brighter
Are you possessed, have you confessed, you are depressed, you are a writer

Silence

On feathered feet
She crept into the room
On the heels of a misspoken word
Her movement invisible
Her arrival sudden and unmentioned
The room descended into her

In whispering black
She encouraged reflection
Floating behind departing blessings
Her presence unnoticed
Her arrival expected
The congregation descended into her

With elastic tension
She moved out from the podium
Chased by eloquent expectation
Her arrival called for
Her departure desired
The crowd descended into her

With compassionate arms
She gripped the wanderer
Followed to solitary vigil
Her embrace desired
But her arrival uncomfortable
The wanderer fell into her 

Patty was a children’s poem
She’d been depressed for quite some time
All her friends were long and hip
While she was short and her words rhymed

Patty made the children laugh
She spoke of toys and games
All her friends preferred the dark
And laughed at Patty’s aims

Crying, dying, full of hate
Her friends they rarely smiled
And Patty never got acclaim
When awards were being filed

Patty tried to change her ways
And speak with more emotion
But she found she missed the laughter
With her new poetic notion

Cynicism all around
She put life back in her words
Forgetting that she was unknown
With each giggle that she heard

Patty still looks at her friends
In relative obscurity
But she’s happy doing what she does
With honesty and purity

Sunset

When I was younger I’d stare at the sun and stumble, blind and erratic, for several minutes as I waited for the ghostly imprint to clear from my vision. I grew older, realised that there are some things too powerful to look upon directly, and no longer tried to out-stare the sun. But it seems that bad habits morph when they don’t grow worse and a picture of you follows me permanently like a watermark on my image of the world. I try not to look at it directly but all too often I let my attention waver and focus on you, making my thoughts stumble, blind and erratic. I try to clear you from my mind but with the effort comes the feeling that I am pushing away my sun. And when I can see again, it is in the gloom of eternal twilight.

Anonymous challenge

I have decided to host an anonymous challenge and in order to make this the most anonymous anonymous challenge yet, I will be altering the rules that most people use for their anonymous challenges.

The theme is: Whatever you think nobody else will write about

The Rules

• All entries are to be anonymous.
• All words of all entries are to anonymous. Any entry sent to me will be disqualified, nobody should know what you wrote except for you.
• The length of the entry should be limited to a text-field of arbitrary size and should be written in a language that is real or invented.
• The winners will be announced in theory, via an invisible post when you think it has been long enough. Winners will not be notified or informed and prizes will not be tangible.
• All entries must be completed before the winning post is not created.

Poker with the prose

Tomorrow

Tomorrow, tomorrow, I will borrow your sorrow
I will carry the weight that married your fate
To the spate of downturns not earned
Today I learned you have been burned
But hate’s been spurned before for something more
Tomorrow, your sorrow will be mine and you will walk lightly like never before

Yesterday has gone away
Tomorrow yesterday will be today
And you can walk among the fray and you can say
The pain insane inside your brain will no longer drain your will to play 

So the ground that pounded you and the sounds that surrounded you
On the day I walked in and on the ground I found you
Will be mine to bear beside your cares
So tomorrow you can get your taste of fair 

Fancy girl

I wrote a poem that nobody read
About a photo that nobody looked at
Of a performance that nobody watched
Of a song that nobody heard
About a meal that nobody tasted
Cooked for the girl I loved that never existed

We met in a celestial dream-scape
Walked out through crowds of imagination
In a world where I was worth the time
Our first kiss came with sunset
She fell asleep in my arms
While I lay awake cradling loneliness 

Come be me

Come ride on my shoulder
Close to my ear
And hear the world
The same as I hear

Come dangle yourself
In front of my eye
Look where I look
To view what I spy

Come take a seat
On my bottom lip
Know bitter or sweet
Each time I sip

Come be a thought
Inside my mind
Witness the beauty
My mind tries to find 

Come ride a vein
Right up to my heart
To feel as I feel
No longer apart

Come be me
Step into my shoe
You can learn me
And I can learn you

Illicit panacea

Well I was playing around
And I was toying with sound
Chatting with the voices inside my head
They were making a proposal
Seeking the disposal 
Of the sanity to which I was firmly wed

Now I was left with a concussion
After the discussion
Too busy being dizzy, I could not refuse
The voices made a quick suggestion
Suggesting the ingestion
Of the drugs that I should use

They said “Have a few amphetamines
But stay away from ketamine
Smoke some green and take a drop of LSD
If you need a little upper
Pop a pinga’ for your supper
But don’t touch ice because it makes you fucking crazy

“If you want act like a cock
You can smoke a little rock
And numb the shame with a lace of PCP
But leave the heroin alone
Unless you want some methadone
We cannot guarantee a fix from DMT”

There I was a-swirling
Drugs curling and whirling
Suggestions a congestion inside my mind
And each one I did try
To try and reach that first high
Left me yearning and learning that I may never find

I still have my favourites
And when I can, I try to savour it
I know I will never find the illicit panacea
All the years that I wasted 
Through the powders that I tasted
May have been better spent with a mind that was clear

I am again playing around
Toying with sound
Ignoring all those voices inside my head
They still make their crude proposals
Asking for disposal
Of the sanity which I recently wed